ARLINGTON, VA — At the inaugural Leadership Conference hosted by the National Association of EMS Managers (NEMSMA) in Arlington, Virginia, EMS leaders from across the country will gather to discuss the future of leadership within our profession. During my keynote session titled “Leading from a position of support,” I will challenge leaders to examine an important distinction that often goes unnoticed in high-performance organizations: the difference between supporting our teams and unintentionally enabling them.
As leaders, it is natural to want to help. Many of us stepped into leadership roles because we care deeply about people and outcomes. We want to solve problems, remove obstacles and ensure our organizations continue moving forward. In EMS, especially, where urgency and responsibility define our work, stepping in to fix things can feel like the right thing to do.
But if we are not careful, good intentions can slowly become something else.
Our desire to help can unintentionally create dependency, rather than growth. It can erode accountability, weaken trust and limit the development of the very people we are trying to lead.
That is why one of the leadership principles I will discuss during this keynote is simple but powerful:
“I do not do for others what they can do for themselves.”
This statement is not about withholding help. Leadership is not about standing back while others struggle. Instead, it is about fostering capability. It is about developing leaders who are confident in their ability to think, decide and act.
Too often, leaders step in because it is faster or easier to do the task themselves. But every time we do that, we remove a learning opportunity. We remove ownership. And over time, we unintentionally train people to rely on us instead of developing the confidence to lead themselves.
Supporting someone means helping them carry the load while they learn to manage it. Enabling someone means carrying the load for them.
Those two approaches produce very different results.
During this session, I will encourage leaders to pause and ask themselves an important question in moments of tension:
Am I solving this problem because it is mine, or because I am avoiding discomfort?
Leadership often requires difficult conversations. It requires accountability. It requires setting boundaries that encourage growth. But many leaders avoid these moments because conflict feels uncomfortable.
Avoiding the conversation may feel easier in the short term, but it often creates larger challenges later. When leaders choose silence instead of clarity, confusion grows and trust erodes.
Truth builds trust. But truth requires courage.
Leading from a position of support means having the courage to engage in conversations that challenge behavior while still honoring the humanity of the person in front of you. It means creating environments where people are encouraged to grow rather than protected from responsibility.
Before stepping in to solve a problem, ask yourself whether your action is building capability or creating dependency.
Support builds leaders.
Enablement builds reliance.
One strengthens an organization. The other weakens it.
Grace also plays a critical role in this leadership conversation. Grace in leadership is often misunderstood as softness or avoidance. In reality, grace requires strength.
Grace is the balance between empathy and accountability.
Grace allows leaders to hold people to a standard while still recognizing their humanity. It allows us to create space for learning, growth, and development while maintaining the expectations necessary for strong teams and healthy organizations.
In EMS leadership, where the demands are constant and the pressure is real, finding that balance is essential.
Leading from a position of support means we walk alongside our teams rather than stepping in front of them. It means we equip others rather than replacing their responsibility. And it means we invest in the development of future leaders who will carry this profession forward.
At the end of the day, leadership is not simply about solving problems or producing results. Leadership is about development.
It is about who we are becoming as leaders and who we are helping others become along the way.
My hope for the leaders attending the NEMSMA Leadership Conference is that they leave this session reflecting on how they show up for their teams. Because when leaders choose support over enablement, they do something powerful — they create organizations where people grow, accountability thrives and leadership multiplies.
