By Eric Chase, EMS1 Contributor
It was late in December and I was grinding through the holiday season. I was often assessing failures from the last call that didn’t end well, compounded with my own feelings of inadequacy. I’d go over the decision points and questions from Monday morning quarterbacks, saying ,"they just don’t know what we do anyhow.”
I wonder why people complain so much. Hell, I wonder why I complain so much.
In our world as EMS providers, we are too often comparing ourselves to other people – typically to a fault – and feel we are being criticized excessively. Despite mottos like, “I got your six” and “one mission, one team,” we get critique from coworkers, emergency department staff, co-responders and physicians. We don’t seem to do this for improvement, but simply to tear others down.
We all fail. Don’t we? Why do I take failure so badly?
Although I try hard to prevent issues or mistakes from occurring, I know they happen. I worry my failures are being seen by others.
Missing joy in my EMS work
One evening after a day off, my wife came home from her work. I was being my typical honest yet negative self. At some point in our conversation, I heard my wife say, “You need to find your joy!”
I was perplexed and gutted all at once. My wife pierced me with the most honest truth I needed to hear. It hurt me to my core.
Time for a change
A few days later, on New Year’s Eve, my wife and I attended an improv performance at a local theater. After the show, the director mentioned a free improv workshop. I told my wife that I would like to attend.
We both went to the workshop a few weeks later. She watched about 20 of us, all strangers, play weird games and do improvisational skits. It was fun and strangely cathartic.
After the workshop, I signed up for a seven-week course which met for two hours every Saturday and culminated in a student performance. I was beside myself with anxiety and self-doubt.
Forgetting my fears
I found that as I played these improv games and did the exercises, I started to forget my fears. Bricks of emotional baggage were starting to fall from my personal façade.
As a public safety professional, I am outwardly confident if not somewhat cocky. Don’t we have to be?
I typically like people if I know them, but don’t always like being around many people.
Here I was, in the improv course, listening and literally laughing out loud at myself and the nine others in my group. I don’t often laugh, let alone laugh out loud. We were not laughing at or ridiculing one another, we were laughing with one another.
Mindfulness to take what is given
Cristela, our director, told us on the first day that improv is about honing your listening skills to respond to your partner’s words or actions and then making them look good. We were to use our partner’s energy and respond with at least equal energy. We were to honor them.
We played games and skits that we were supposed to fail in and celebrate the failure. In improv, we were told, there really isn’t failure.
“Yes, and” is a key principle of improvisation. Participants take what is given to them and don’t make it negative.
We were to boldly take what we received from our partner and go on with it. We learned to let whatever is going to happen, happen. It is truly hilarious.
The beauty I have found in improv is that I never say no and always am positive with a “Yes, and” response or reaction to my partner. In improv, as we learn to develop our skills, there is no failure or right way. Improv uses energy in an atmosphere of trust, building relationships with communication and spontaneous mindfulness.
Benefits of improv to my EMS career
Improv is helping tear down some of my walls of guardedness and anxiety. I feel exposed and yet more full of life.
I realized I use improv skills all the time as a professional. I have to put on my game face during high-stress incidents, as well as the mundane daily responsibilities. The problem for me was that I had been using the “No, and” principle more often than “Yes, and.”
“No, and” has not gotten me where I needed to go as a professional, friend or spouse.
In my class we have students, aerospace engineers, judges, business people, educators and more. All came with their own fears, darkness and social anxieties. All of us were seeking something better without knowing if it was even possible.
Just prior to our performance, Cristela told us one last big component of improv. It is to tell your partner or group, “I’ve got your back!”
Before going on stage, we literally placed our hand on our partner’s back and looked them in the eye as we told them, “I’ve got your back.”
As trivial as this may sound to some, it was bold and confirmed to one another a commitment we made to each other. After our performance, Jason, a classmate, said to me:
“This group has seriously been life changing for me. The last year has been the most difficult of my life, but this group has really helped pull me out of a rough patch. I can honestly say I’m thankful for where I am today and how I got here. The present is a great place to be and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”
Improv is life changing
I have read and truly feel that it’s a fine line between psychological illness and having mechanisms to cope with life and work stresses. With improv I have crossed this line and I am ready to go forward, continuing to utilize the principles and practices of coping with my issues.
Improv has helped me: decrease my social anxiety and improve my mindfulness, ability to be present, and confidence (not cockiness). It has also sharpened my listening skills and increased my ability to laugh, play and trust. Most importantly I have more joy in my work and my life away from work.
I have found several studies about the use of improv to help people with PTSD or other psycho-social issues. A university student’s capstone project explores the use of improv to enhance workplace relationships [1].
In public safety we should work to advance people and our mission. I am committed to using these improv concepts because I have felt the difference and others have noticed a difference in me as well.
“Yes, and” your partner, friend, child or loved ones. Make them look good by honoring their energy with integrity. In life and EMS, it is our reaction and response that matters.
Improvisation plays a large role in our daily lives. My focus and desire is to bring improv training and skill as a form of personal development and tool for hope to more people.
My story isn’t over. When I get the opportunity to listen, I hope my response is “Yes, and” and you’ll know that I’ve got your back!
References
1. I’ve Got Your Back: Utilizing Improv as a Tool to Enhance Workplace Relationships by Jordana Cole University of Pennsylvania 8-1-2016.
About the author
Eric Chase is a paramedic with 13 years of experience in law enforcement and 12 years in fire and EMS.